Insomnia is a funny thing in late pregnancy. At a time when I should be sleeping more, I end up sleeping less. I am not the only one awake. I've been hearing an owl at this time in the early morning (around 4:30 am). Today, there are two. The closer one hoots in a deeper register, this is not the first time I've heard it. But today, someone answers, further away, with a higher pitched hoot. The sound they make is somewhat mystical, from their anonymous perch in the night.
The quiet of the early morning is a great time to think, and once again my mind drifts to goats. I dream of goats at night, I read about them during the day. I sit in what might become the goat pasture, and contemplate what needs to be done. Build a shelter, put up a fence, buy hay. When walking in the fields and bushes, I see different plants and twigs and think "The goats would like that." It's a strange obsession for an 8 year vegan veteran, and a bizarre thing for a woman expecting a baby to be thinking about.
But my body is asking for dairy. Not just any dairy. Unpasteurized, non-homogenized, grass fed, organic dairy. Such a thing hardly exists in Alberta. What my body is asking for is illegal, and no farmer within two hours of my location is willing to provide me with such a substance for fear that their farm be shut down. Without getting into the politics of the industry, or the potential health risks of drinking commercialized dairy, I'll just say that the only way I've found for me to have such a food is to provide it for myself. And so, my mind drifts to goats.
I am considering the purchase of two goats from a local family on a small farm. Capella is a four year old doe who is currently being bred. She will kid (have goat babies) in five months and start giving milk. Her companion is Star, a four year old weather (a neutered male). He has some experience pulling a cart, and I'm thinking of getting him to help me with some of the gardening next year. They are both Toggenburgs, a Swiss dairy breed. They'll be ready in two weeks if I want them.
Most of the people around me have implied that this idea is crazy. My mom expressed concern that I will have too much on my plate. Between settling into my new place, getting my kids started in a new school, and having a baby, she feels I will be maxed out.
Rather than seeing farming as extra unnecessary work, I see it as a primal survival technique. Living off the land, as humans did for centuries, puts us in touch with nature and with history. I'm sure I wouldn't be the first woman with three kids to milk a goat every day to feed herself or her family.
But maybe I'm romanticizing the idea too much in my head. I do tend to drift more towards idealism than realism. In my defense, I am used to working 12 hour days on top of getting kids to school, helping with homework, doing laundry, and putting dinner on the table. Now all I have to do is take care of my family and build a life for myself in the country. I'm just trying to figure out what that life should entail. Is this a step in the right direction? Am I ready to take it?
